God received a delegation of animals complaining of their lot in life.
There was an elephant, a giraffe, and a hen.
The elephant complained,
“Lord, I HATE THIS TRUNK YOU have given me
It gets in the way, and makes me look like a fool”!
The Lord said,
“Don’t complain
It lets you pick up food, drink water, etc
without getting wet”!
Next the giraffe complained,
“Lord, I HATE THIS LONG NECK! It makes me top heavy, I get terrible neck pains, and people laugh at me”!
The Lord said,
“Don’t complain
It lets you pick the best fruit and leaves from the high branches, and allows you to see a distance”.
The hen spoke up,
“Lord, I don’t want to complain….
but either let me have a bigger a*s or smaller eggs”.
The teacher put a question to the class:
“What does a cat have that no other animal
A number cried in unison:
“Fur!”
But an objector raised the point that bears and skunks have fur. One pupil raised an eager hand:
“I know, teacher–whiskers!”
But another objector laughed scornfully.
“Haw-haw! My papa has whiskers!”
The suggester of whiskers defended her idea by declaring:
“My papa ain’t got whiskers.”
“‘Cause he can’t!” the objector sneered. “Haw-haw! Your pa ain’t no good. My pa says—-“
The teacher rapped for order and repeated her question.
A little Johnny raised his hand, and at the teacher’s nod spoke timidly.
“Kittens!”
